Leaping into life.

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This whole year I have been to-ing and fro-ing with myself to make a life change. I wrote a little bit about it here after watching a video on YouTube. I have gone back and forth about whether I will like said change, whether I will miss my family, whether I am ready, whether I am worthy, what if I fail? When I get lost in a day dream thinking of myself working in my dream job, living in my dream home, I get so excited; like I have to pursue my dream or perish. Momentarily after, whilst still on a high,  anxiety and fear start to sweep in and pull the daydream from right underneath me. The fear of failure and self-doubt seep into my conscious and I revert quickly away from my fantasy and leave it untouched until I forget the feeling. Through encouragement of my family, friends and future 30-year-old self who doesn't want to look back on life and wonder 'what if?' I have decided to take the leap to chase my dream: to move to Sydney and work for a fashion or lifestyle/travel/food/interior publication, otherwise known as one of the hardest industries to crack. It's my dream and it has been since I was 12 years old and read an interview with the then Dolly magazine Editor Bronwyn Mccahon and thought 'that's exactly what I want to do'. I still do want to do that to this day and I need to honour this inkling I have had for such a long time now. 

To chase my dream I am moving 1000km away from my family, friends and boyfriend without a job to a new city that I have spent less than 7 days in at a time. I am lucky to have a lovely friend who has found me a room in her home and begged me to take this giant leap of faith. If you ask me today if I am excited for change I would say "Absolutely!". If you had of asked me two days ago then tears would have started streaming down my face from stress, anxiety and fear from the self-sabotaging doubt. I have been bit of a yo-yo of late because this whole experience is uncomfortable and I don't know what will happen. The planned and organised side of me is freaking out and the free spirit buried deep down in me is thrilled to be on the verge of something new and exciting. In five weeks time my life will be nothing like it has been for the last 22 years. It will be completely different. Instead of being overcome with worry and self-doubt it's time to be brave and throw myself at life, embrace what it has to offer and see where it takes me... I can't wait to share this new journey with you.